|this entry is two weeks overdue. i'd like to write it still, anyway.|
it was a sunday. an extraordinary one, i should say. because after 8 years, it was the first time i was gonna attend church service again. (my friends couldn't believe it, i swear!) i was with george. and after surviving the earth-shaking year-ender we had, we realized it was time to take the relationship to another level.
so there i found ourselves at gcf, at 6 in the evening, singing and clapping songs of praise along with rest. i have always been spiritual. but i was never what one might call a devout catholic, or a christian. i have always believed in the Supreme Being, but i have stopped calling it God, or Lord, or Jesus, or Father, after high school.
attending christian service that sunday didn't change my spirituality. i just couldn't help but marvel at the way people celebrate their God and proclaim their faith. right in front of us, there was a woman hugging her (something like) 10-year old son while praying. there were men and women crying.
i am still neither a devout catholic nor a christian, but i have found so much solace, knowing that there is still the Divine Good that people still have faith in. It helps knowing this because as long as this is true, we are assured that we will go on living. we are assured that there is still hope for a better world. we are assured that "despite all its sham, drudgeries and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world." (--desiderata)
Sunday, February 06, 2005
|it has been a while since my last blog.|
i saw a play last saturday that fell short of my expectation. i had so much adoration for the director before his most recent work. the experience disillusioned me. but the effort of dressing up and going to the theater wasn't at all futile. the experience served as a reminder to my artist-self to not be complacent. the work that i saw frustrated me, but at the same time, taught me that just because one was hailed in the past doesn't mean he can't fail in the future.
then i went out with george and his college peers to drink. had 4 vodka doubles and a san mig light. i was near to getting buzzed. it was fun. but i thought, i was having just as much fun sober. i have come to a point where alcohol does not spell H-A-P-P-I-N-E-S-S for me anymore. i have found other things to spell it for me.
it has been a while too since i got my last alcohol fix.